Can female desire exist without defining itself in relation to violence?

Aftertouch Vol.1 is an ambiguous title, alluding on the one hand to a musical term that describes the lingering pressure on a key after it is struck, and in an allegorical sense to the emotional echo of a sexual assault.

The work consists of a three-channel video installation paired with a performative part, which explores the complex, mutated and twisted terrain of female sexual agency and pleasure. Through stroboscopic projections in a darkened space, techno music and layered spoken word, the piece creates a bizarre tension between agitated anticipation, sensory overload, and paralyzing horror.

The core of the work consists of the song text: three stories, which were told to the artist by women close to her—stories of sex, power dynamics, and violation. How is female sexuality shaped by internalized and external power structures? Female desire and lust seem indistinguishable from trauma, and in order to separate the two, word by word, memory by memory, must first be critically examined and, above all, called by their name. Aftertouch Vol.1 is the first part of an ongoing series based on interviews and stories from countless other women.

I have another story, and if you want, I can tell you. It is kinda hard to hear though. Do you want to hear it? Are you sure you don’t want to hear it? I think I should tell you. You don’t? You don’t wanna hear it? I’m gonna tell you, yes. I will tell you. Ready?